so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
