i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize