Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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