operation harelip BJ is a go
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Randomize
