I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
