Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
