i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize