Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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