we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize