I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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