I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
