its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
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