As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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