Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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