My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
