Its about making memories worth repressing
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
