I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
