saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
