When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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