You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
