You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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