he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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