so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
where am i from again
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
