We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
