no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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