dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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