are you still at the devil's house?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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