Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
