I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
i've created a new STD.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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