Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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