return my video game
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
