before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
