You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
We are all done wearing pants today
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
