let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
