Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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