And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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