No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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