why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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