hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
