you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize