so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
We left the knife in your bed.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
