yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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