I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
