Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
