Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Randomize