Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
