Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
as a side note pls kill me
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
