So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The power of my boobs compel you
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
