Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
