Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize